Confusion

It's been a long while since I have put my thoughts to "paper." I have tried to hold them in  and work them out within myself before I let them out. I can honestly say that they are not anymore worked out than they were before. I am struggling with several areas in my life but have maintained the attitude that "this to shall pass". Sometimes decisions are made on emotion and not carefully thought through. Sometimes you reach a point in your life that thinking seems to influence your decision in a negative way. Follow your heart is what they say, but your heart doesn't always know what is right for you. You can want something with all of your heart, but that doesn't mean that it is the right thing, or that it will work out. I know what I want in my life and the only person that is holding me back is me. I have dreams and ambitions that not everyone else understands but than again who cares what they understand. I have tried to live my life caring for others, and yet I seem to hurt everyone that I love. I have given of my cup freely and yet it sits here empty. People take and take and yet for some to give a morsel is asking for blood. I have come to a point in my life that I must reevaluate my life and the choices that I have made to this point. Life is something that must be worked at. Happiness is a choice. Loving is a choice that opens the gate for pain. You can love with another with all your heart. You can only be true to yourself and hope that another will love you for the person that you are. Love you with all your imperfections and find the little things in life to love you for. You are not supposed to busy yourself with the petty things in life that bring no positive influence in your life. You are supposed to fight for what you love. What if the fight in you is gone? What if you are not sure that it's something that you want to fight for? When is the line drawn for how much you can give of yourself? Every girl dreams of that fairy tale and often times life hypes up those dreams and yet there is no one who can fulfill those dreams. So is this because we dream to big? Is it that we want something that is virtually impossible? We cannot change a person into whom we want them to be. We have to love them for who they are, what they do and what they believe. Compromise is a talent that must be learned and respected from both parties. Words should never be spoken in hurt, promises not made to only be broken and feelings understood and not trampled on. Working every moment, living for the moments. Careful consideration taken for what another is going through. Not focusing on only yourself but your family in it's entirety. Taking it day by day and not filling today with the worries of tomorrow...